


Would you take a selfie with a dead body?

by cyanidetxxic



Category: Polygon/McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: Blood, Character Death, Gen, Murder Mystery, Paranormal, Paranormal Investigators, Thriller and Comedy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 15:38:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19065571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyanidetxxic/pseuds/cyanidetxxic
Summary: The sudden death of their roommate brings two best friends together to discover who the murderer is. With the help of the supernatural presence of their roommate, they embark on a thrilling adventure with many twists and turns. But the more important question is:Would you take a selfie with a dead body?(Comment participation is highly encouraged.)





	Would you take a selfie with a dead body?

**Author's Note:**

> So I thought I might test out this kind of a fic. Not the first time I've written a murder mystery, but this is the first time I'm writing it in this type of format. The riddles are all connected into one big riddle, so this is more about piecing together each information from each riddle to get to the conclusion of the final one. The comments will dictate whether the two main characters can figure out what each note.

Laura heard a piercing scream. She immediately went out of her room, seeing Jonah also exiting his room. They looked at each other, then at the living room where Brian was recording his video. The camera was pointing at the bathroom, still rolling.

Weird.

They both slowly approached the bathroom and Laura couldn't hold back her screams, bumping into Jonah when she backed away. 

There laid, in a pool of blood, her brother, eyes wide open and lifeless. Tears welled up in her eyes as she found herself on her knees, slowly crawling to her brother's dead body. 

"No, no, no… Why? H-how?" Laura looked back at Jonah to find him also in utter disbelief and tears in his eyes. 

"I don't know…" Jonah said quietly as he walked closer. "There are no wounds either, what the fuck…" 

Laura also looked over the body and just as Jonah said, there was no wound to be found anywhere on Brian's body, but there was too much blood for it to not come from a deep wound. 

"I don't get it… a moment ago he was just filming, I could hear him do his dumb video and it didn’t sound like anything was wrong at all.” 

Laura tried to wipe her tears away, but only managed to smear blood all over her face.

Jonah put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Both of their heads turned to Brian’s phone when it started going off. Jonah picked it up, although he couldn’t unlock the phone, he still opened it to see the notifications. He saw tweets and replies about Brian’s new video and Jonah felt a bit confused. Did they mean the Pokerap? That was a while ago. Jonah took out his phone and checked Brian’s channel. When he saw a video being posted there, his eyes went wide.

“Laura… Laura, you have to see this.” Jonah said as he patted Laura’s shoulder.

“What? What’s wrong?” Laura peeked at Jonah’s phone then gasped. “There’s… there’s no way…”

“...Should we watch it?” Jonah suggested quietly.

“Yes. Definitely. Maybe it will tell us how he died.” Laura reached in and tapped on the video for it to start playing.

They watched the video of Brian making a tutorial on how to cut jorts. The video went as both of them would expect from a normal BDG video. When they saw the bloody bathtub scene, they thought that was when they would find out what happened with Brian, but instead, the video continued with Brian still alive and well, but much paler and ended with Brian dancing in the living room. Laura couldn’t help but peek into the living room to see if Brian was indeed dancing there and this was nothing more than a sick joke. But Brian was not there when she looked, Brian was still dead in the bathtub.

“What do we do with the body, now?” Jonah asked.

Laura shrugged.

“Let’s… let’s just clean it up and stuff, we’ll get to the bottom of this tomorrow, I’m really tired now,” she mumbled.

So the two of them began cleaning the bathtub from blood, then Brian’s body.   
  


* * *

 

They ended up just keeping Brian on the couch for a while. That wasn’t weird at all, no way, but they also didn’t know where to put them. Laura didn’t know what to tell their parents either. They just wanted to figure this whole mess out before they announced Brian’s death to the world. After all, how can they explain that Brian randomly died in a pool of blood with no actual wounds on him? Exactly, no way of making sense of that!

Yet a week later they realize that somehow Brian was still working at Polygon and that he apparently has been interacting, chatting, working, all of the normal stuff, and Laura felt like she was going insane because her brother’s body was literally sitting on the couch next to her.

She almost screamed in hysteria when Pat called her to ask why Brian wasn’t answering his phone and to ask him out for drinks. Laura just answered that Brian is very sick, but the next day she received a text from Pat expressing his confusion because Brian seemed very much fine the next day. She just replied with ‘that’s what he told me to tell you, I don’t know what else to say’ and left it at that.

Jonah was also having a hard time dealing with this, although he wasn’t getting approached as often by Brian’s coworkers and more by close friends of Brian’s, and just like Laura, he had no proper way of answering any of their questions.

“This is too much,” Jonah said as he dropped on the couch.

“Jonah! Please, I’m trying to take a selfie!” Laura huffed as she tried to reposition herself and Brian’s body, her fingers pushing the corners of Brian’s mouth into a smile.

“What the hell are you doing, Laura?” Jonah furrowed his brow as he looked over at his roommates.

“I’m trying to convince Simone that Brian is here and not in her washing machine.” Laura forced her best smile as she took the selfie.

“You’re insane.” Jonah sighed and put his head into his hands.

“This whole situation is insane, Jonah, and we can’t do much about it either.” Laura let go of Brian and quickly sent a text to Simone. “I hate how he always ends up looking very much alive in pictures, but when he’s right here, he’s just… dead.”

“As I said, this is too much. We should just dispose of the body, move out, and just… not deal with anything ever again.”

Laura glared at him.

“No. We will look like criminals! Jonah, do you want us to go to jail?”

There was a pause. Jonah looked in deep thought.

“Okay, but jail is much nicer these days.” Jonah inquired with a shrug.

“Oh my god.” Laura put her hands up in the air to signal that she was done. She gave up. This was it for her.

“How do you plan to catch Brian’s killer anyway?” Jonah grabbed Brian’s hands and put them in Brian’s lap.

“I don’t know, maybe we find this guy that keeps showing up at Brian’s work and pretends to be Brian? Maybe he’s the killer?” Laura suggested, putting her hands on her head.

“That is actually a good idea. I never thought that this guy showing up at Brian’s work could be Brian’s killer or something, I thought he was, like… a ghost.” Jonah ran a hand through his hair as he sunk further into the couch.

“Ghosts aren’t real, stupid.” Laura rolled her eyes. “The only real ghost here is my motivation to exist in this plane of existence.”

From the corner of her eye, she saw Brian’s hand on her shoulder. She screamed and instantly moved away. Then she saw that it was just Jonah puppeteering Brian’s corpse.

“I’m sorry, Laura, didn’t mean to scare you.” Jonah moved Brian’s mouth as he spoke in a high pitched voice to “imitate” Brian.

Laura slapped Jonah’s hand away from her brother’s mouth and glared.

“Stop. No. Don’t do that. That’s fucked up.” Laura said.

“Earlier you were taking a selfie with him, I didn’t think it’d be that big of a deal.” Jonah huffed.

“Yeah, but I did that to cover our asses, not to scare you!”

Jonah pressed his lips together, then looked away. "I'm sorry."

Laura got up from the couch. "It's fine. Let's just focus on catching the fucker who killed my brother." She was about to head into her room, but then stopped in her tracks. "Hey… That rhymed and sounded good."

When Laura turned to Jonah, she saw that he had his hand raised. She grinned and gave Jonah a hard high five. Hell yeah.

 

* * *

 

When Laura entered the building, she felt like a stranger. While this wasn't the first time she visited Polygon, she definitely didn't feel as comfortable coming there as all the other times.

Still, she had her eyes on the prize. She could see the man pretending to be her brother going towards the elevator, so she tried to catch up with him. 

"Hey, Brian! Wait for me!" She waved her hand as she reached the Brian clone just as he entered the elevator, and went in with him. Or, well, she made sure to push him inside the elevator first. 

When she turned around to talk to him, he was gone, as if he was never there in the first place. Laura stared at the empty space beside her wide-eyed, her hands ending up in her hair as she exhaled loudly, only to keep herself from screaming. 

Laura exited the elevator before anyone saw her and walked out of the building. As soon as she was out, she called Jonah. 

"Remember what I said about ghosts? Yeah, I'm sorry for ever doubting you." Laura said as soon as Jonah picked up. 

"Wha... Laura, are you serious? Wait, what happened?" Jonah’s voice was groggy as if he had just woken up. 

"Well—" 

Laura stopped herself when she saw Simone walk around the corner and she immediately moved to hide behind a trash can. 

"I'll tell you when I get home, I have something important to do," Laura said. 

"Wait, La—" 

And that's when Laura ended the call. 

She watched as Simone passed by, almost noticing Laura if it wasn’t for her attention to be grabbed by a cheery Brian calling her name. For the first time, she was thankful for the bastard ghost to save her ass. Brian looked into Laura’s direction and offered her a wink, which sent shivers down Laura’s spine.

“Crap,” she muttered to herself. She needed to flee. Now. Bestest time to abscond.

When she arrived back at the apartment, Brian’s corpse was still there, on the couch, and Laura just… Sat down on the floor, rubbing her forehead.

“Was it that bad? Do you want some tea?” For a second, Laura thought Brian asked that, but no, when she looked up, it was just Jonah.

She sighed and went back to rubbing her forehead. “Yes. Please. I need it.”

“Coming right up!” Jonah said a bit too cheery for Laura’s comfort. “Oh, also, I grabbed a little bit of your makeup and followed a small makeup tutorial to make Brian look a bit more alive. And also stuffed him with car air fresheners that I stuffed in his pants so he wouldn’t smell so bad.”

“You’re way too calm about this.” Laura pointed out.

“I’m really not, I’m freaking the fuck out right now,” Jonah said eerily calm.

Laura just laid on the floor and screamed in frustration.

A few minutes later, Jonah returned with the much-needed tea, which Laura happily enjoyed. It didn’t help her get a clearer image of what was going on, but she definitely felt much calmer about the whole situation.

“So… what happened?” Jonah asked after a few minutes of silence.

“I went in and saw the motherfucker. He was about to enter the elevator and just as I pushed him in, when I looked for him in the elevator, he wasn’t there anymore. He fully disappeared. Which leads me to believe that he’s a ghost. Or something like that.” Laura took another sip from her tea.

“Okay…” Jonah leaned his head on his fist. “So what do we do about that? Any way to contact him and ask him if he knows who killed him?”

“I don’t know. Should we look online or something?” Laura couldn’t help but look over at Brian’s dead body.

“Yeah, we’ll probably find something.” Jonah looked up at Laura to nod at her.

“Oh yeah, speaking of ghostly appearances, the ghost Brian managed to have a full conversation with Simone while I was outside hiding behind a trash can, and then he just winked at me.” Laura turned her head to Jonah as she spoke.

“Why were you hiding behind a trash can?”

“So Simone wouldn’t see me and start questioning things. Really, ghost Brian saved my ass.” Laura put her cup on the coffee table and laid back on the ground.

“Sounds like it.” Jonah chuckled.

 

“Wild, right?” Laura picked her empty cup to take it to the dishwasher when she noticed a piece of folded paper in her cup. “Huh… what’s this? Did you put this here, Jonah?”

Jonah shook his head.

“No, not at all. What is it?” Jonah peeked over Laura’s shoulder.

Laura unfolded the paper and began reading aloud what it said.

 

“ **_You’ve always known the murderer sitting next to you._ ** ****_  
_ **_These murderers live in your house,_ ** ****_  
_ **_they do the dishes,_ ** ****_  
_ **_they smile a lot,_ ** ****_  
_ **_and when you expect the least,_ ** ****_  
_ **_they cover you in pig’s blood._ ** ****_  
_ **_For what is a man to these people,_ ** **_  
_ ** ****_but a pig whose work is never finished? -Brian_ ”

 

Laura’s eyes went wide as she finished the note.

“He… he contacted us.” Laura looked up at Brian’s corpse. “You contacted us. You’re trying to tell us who did it, aren’t you?”

She went to grab Brian’s hand.

“For God’s sake, please stop being so cryptic, just tell us their name.” Laura groaned.

The lights flickered. No answer, though. Laura pressed her forehead against Brian’s hand.

“We’ll find them, I promise,” Laura muttered.

“Yeah, we’ll find them.” Jonah put a comforting hand on Laura’s shoulder.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for deciding to play along. If you'd like, you can follow me on Tumblr at ohoneyno.tumblr.com!


End file.
